Years Keep Rolling By
by pandorabox82
Summary: Sarah O'Brien never expected to see her former employers face to face ever again, when she stayed in India. But when she has to be Cora's lady's maid one last time, will she be able to keep her feelings in check?


The one thing Sarah O'Brien had never been able to become accustomed to in the years since she had made her way to India was the overbearing heat. Lady Susan's negativity had been a hard thing to get used to, but even that was a small grievance when compared to the stickiness that accompanied the heat. It was on those warmest summer days that she longed for somewhere she could never be again, with someone she could never have.

Letting out a deep sigh, she pushed away from the table she had been sitting at and made her way outside. Pulling a long, thin, cigarette out of her pocket, she lit it and took a few long drags as she allowed her thoughts to spool backwards and across the miles to _her_. The one person who had always meant the world to her, even though she knew that her feelings would never be reciprocated, could never be returned, based on who they were to each other.

The one question Lady Susan had asked of her, when they had been informed of their return to England, was if she was returning with them. It had taken her so little time to answer, though it was not to her ladyship's liking, and thank god she had stashed away all her extra money, as Lady Susan had dismissed her after that, though she had allowed her to find work as a lady's maid with another family. Which was where she was now, trying to fit in, and refusing to admit how desperately lonely she had become over the last few years.

After all, Lady Susan had been her only link to Cora, and Sarah had made certain to ask for stories about the woman as often as she could dare to, knowing that Cora both vexed and amused Lady Susan. It had been fascinating, really, to find out small things that she had never been privy to as Cora's lady's maid. She had treasured these tidbits in her mind, calling them back when things became to difficult with her current employer, and she felt like she was going to scream or go mad with frustration.

"O'Brien! Have you heard?"

She whipped her head around to see that the butler, Mister Jameson, had come out into the courtyard, and she beckoned him over to her side. "The only thing I've heard is that the heat is not supposed to break for another ten long days."

He gave her an appraising look before staring at her lit cigarette. "I'm certain you would be a bit cooler if you didn't insist on smoking," he replied drolly, and she shrugged before stubbing out her smoke and turning her full attention on the man. "You're going to have to pull double duty for a short time, O'Brien. We're to have visitors for a fortnight, and she's not bringing her lady's maid. Something about her current lady's maid being unable to travel due to being in the family way."

Gossip was always good, but this gossip was telling her nothing that she needed to know about who she was serving. "And? Who is this mystery lady I'll be serving for two bloody weeks?" she asked peevishly, wishing the man would get to the point.

"Lady Grantham."

Sarah felt like her blood had turned to ice in her veins as she stared at the ground. "Oh," was all she could manage to say before she frowned deeply, trying to act like she couldn't care less about the visitors that were joining them shortly. "When will Lord and Lady Grantham arrive?"

"Lady Grantham and Lady Flintshire will arrive tomorrow morning, Lord Grantham is indisposed, according to Lord Irwin."

This was a fine kettle of fish that Sarah suddenly found herself in, and her frown deepened as she crushed the cigarette between her fingers, the tobacco spilling to the ground as she tried to regain control of her emotions. "Well, that will certainly be interesting." Jameson tilted his head to one side as he raised his eyebrows. "If you'll excuse me."

Sarah made her way back into the house and hurried up to her room, the heat suddenly feeling that much more oppressive as the realization that she would be seeing her Cora again so soon, with no time to prepare for it adequately. Once she was safely ensconced in her room, Sarah fiddled with the buttons on her gown, loosening the first three as she picked up a fan and desperately tried to cool off. Finding it useless, she sank down onto the bed and buried her face in her hands, wondering just how she would face Cora once more.

Somehow, she made it through the rest of her day, though Lady Irwin did comment on the fact that she seemed to have her head in the clouds. She had given some noncommittal answer to her ladyship, one that she seemed to take at face value, and Sarah had scurried from the room the moment her ladyship had slipped into bed.

Sleep, though, proved to be the farthest thing from her reach, and she stared up at the ceiling of her small room, trying to keep her mind from slipping to thoughts of Cora, and how she might have changed in the years since they had last seen each other. Or how she might feel at coming face to face with her after she had abandoned her so long ago. Maybe they wouldn't even discuss it, or maybe Cora would pretend that she didn't know her at all. She didn't know how she would react to either, honestly, and that thought ran her ragged until she finally fell unconscious, unable to call it sleep, since she woke up feeling even more exhausted than she had been the previous day.

As she dressed Lady Irwin, Sara tried to focus on what she was saying, and not the roiling in her stomach that had caused her to miss breakfast, only able to drink a hot cuppa before feeling her stomach rebel. "And you'll need to show Lady Grantham to her room, and get acquainted with her before you dress her for supper this evening. I am counting on you to take care of her just as well as you take care of me."

"Yes, milady," she replied softly as she finished arranging her hair before handing her a parasol to keep the sun out of her eyes. Lady Irwin nodded to her, and then swept from the room. Sarah followed in her wake, her heart threatening to drop into the pit of her stomach as she realized how close she was to seeing Cora once more.

Sarah held her hand up to her eyes as she stepped out into the blazing Indian sun. There was a stillness to the air that morning, as if even the wind was waiting on bated breath for Cora to arrive. Finally, her eyes became accustomed to the sunlight, and she lowered her hand to watch the drive. Jameson took up his position next to Mrs Staunton, though she did see that he gave her an almost knowing look, which she tried to ignore as she returned her focus to the head of the drive. Moments later, a car drove up, and she could tell by the opulence of the vehicle that Cora and Lady Flintshire had arrived. Unconsciously, she straightened her spine a little, trying to appear more cool and collected than she actually felt.

The car came to a stop, and Sarah felt her eyes soften as she watched the driver open the door and help Cora out of the vehicle. Her ladyship was just as beautiful as she remembered, and she had to dig her thumbnail into the meat of her palm to keep from sighing as she raked her eyes up her form until she was looking into those deep blue eyes that she had never been able to forget. It seemed like Cora had forgotten all about her, since her gaze quickly passed over Sarah to look at the other servants before she went up to Lady Irwin and began to speak with her. Lady Flintshire gave her an appraising look, and she dipped her chin a little under the scrutiny, wondering just how much the woman had been able to discern about her.

They went inside, and Sarah found herself falling in step with the maid that had accompanied Lady Susan and Lady Cora, the young woman nattering on about how wonderful it had been to travel on a steamship, and how she had been so looking forward to seeing India, even if Lady Flintshire hadn't been certain she could do any exploring. Sarah began to tune her out, her own thoughts turning to Cora. She had looked so beautiful in white linen, and her face had looked almost exactly the same, just a few more smile lines to crinkle around her eyes. If anything, that endeared her to Sarah all the more, and she finally released the sigh that had trembled on her lips for so long. Mabel the chatterbox took notice of her slight noise, and gave her a smile brighter than the sun.

"I have the feeling that we are going to get along so well! You can tell me everything about getting around in India, and I can tell you about all you've missed in England. How long have you been here?"

The sheer earnestness in Mabel reminded her strongly of Anna Bates, and she fought to keep from rolling her eyes at the young woman, since she knew she couldn't afford to lose a potential mark this early in the game. "I've been here for four years now."

Mabel nodded eagerly, looking like a puppet of sorts, and Sarah had to stifle her mean laugh as they made their way upstairs. Still, Mabel continued to run her mouth, even though Sarah didn't give say anything more than yes or no when needed. "So, where are my quarters going to be?"

"I'll show you after we make certain that Lady Cora and Lady Susan are well settled into their room. This is Lady Flintshire's room, I'll meet you out here in the hall when I am done taking care of Lady Cora."

She only hoped that her voice sounded even, as she didn't want Mabel to have any inkling about her feelings towards _her_ , and from the look on the younger woman's face, she had succeeded. The maid gave her a small nod before slipping into Lady Susan's room, and Sarah let out a deep breath before squaring her shoulders and stepping into Cora's room.

"I've been sent to see if you need help settling in, milady," she said as she folded her hands primly in front of her, her gaze carefully averted to look at the floor.

"Dear O'Brien, you were always so good at thinking about my needs."

There was an edge to Cora's voice, something she had only heard when she was upset with his lordship, and Sarah quickly looked up to see that the woman was staring at her, her face a blank slate. Sarah found that she couldn't hold the gaze for too long, her cheeks heating up in a fierce blush as she stared down at the floor once more. "Which is why I had to leave," she murmured as she stepped closer to her.

"You didn't have to do anything. I would have stood up for you no matter what Bates or Thomas tried to throw at you. You didn't need to run."

To her horror, Sarah began to tear up as she shook her head. "There were things that Thomas knew about me that you would hate. So I left before I could disappoint you once more."

A flurry of movement caught her attention, and she stared at Cora's feet as she approached her. Unconsciously, she stiffened up as the woman reached out and touched her arm. It was something Cora would never have done before she had left, so Sarah really had no way of reading the situation, which left her floundering. "You were the only one I could think of as a friend. We had our own little jokes, something I could never find again with Baxter."

"Milady, I'm certain that you had others…"

Her words were cut off sharply when Cora took hold of her hand and squeezed tightly, causing her to look up into the woman's eyes. "Who comes to Downton, Sarah? Who sees me daily? No one, and then you left me alone with Robert. I felt like I was suffocating, positively suffocating! And you had managed to escape that atmosphere, and make the decision not to come back with Susan. You were free, and I was stuck."

She hadn't realized how close they were standing until that moment, since her head had naturally lifted to keep Cora's gaze, but the feel of their hips and breasts gently touching caught her attention and she swallowed thickly as their faces drifted even closer. "I couldn't do this any longer, Lady Cora. You were like a flame to my moth, and I needed to get away before I burnt to a crisp. And you would have sent me away with disgrace when you found out my secret."

"About the soap?" Sarah blinked with shock, wanting to take a step back from Cora, needing to regain her bearing, but she found herself rooted to the spot as Cora lifted her hand and cupped her cheek. "Did you really think that I wouldn't know? Your contrition showed on your face as you helped me through that awful business. I don't know why you would do something like that, but it happened, and we never spoke of it because you don't speak of something like that. Perhaps, looking back, we should have, as I might not have lost you."

Cora's thumb was so soft on her cheek, her eyes turning gentle. A delicate tension rose up between them, and Sarah drew in a shallow breath as her eyes slid closed, almost anticipating what came next. There were a few heartbeats between the onset of darkness and the feel of Cora's lips against hers, and then Sarah was trying to keep on her feet as Cora's arm wrapped around her waist, holding her close as the kiss lingered on.

Finally, though, they had to separate, and Sarah was the first to step back, her hand fluttering around her chest as she tried to get her labored breathing under control. "I probably would have left, anyway, Lady Cora. There's only so much a person can take before they need to leave the thing that's slowly killing them," she panted out, moving back towards the door.

What she hadn't counted on was the fact that they had moved during the kiss, and instead of reaching the door, Sarah hit the edge of the bed, losing balance and falling back against it. Cora didn't laugh at her, for which she was grateful, instead, joining her on the bed, her long fingers running up and down Sarah's arm as she stared into her eyes. There was something almost manic about the look, and Sarah frowned as she tilted her head to one side, licking her lips a little as her brow furrowed in a deeper frown. "Susan told me that you would be here, seemed to lord it over me, since she knew that she had taken you away from me, and that I couldn't have you again. Since I have to return home to Robert and Baxter. That doesn't mean I can't make a few memories while I'm here."

There was a purr to Cora's voice, something she had never used for Sarah before, but she had to fight to keep from shivering at the sound, not wanting her to know how much she was affecting her. Still, Cora just seemed to know that she was getting beneath her skin, as a wicked smile curved her lips as she began to fiddle with the buttons on the front of Sarah's dress, thoroughly distracting her from trying to get up. "Still, this isn't smart, milady. Anyone could walk in on us."

"Are you really worrying about your reputation, dear Sarah? When you should really be thinking about how you can keep me here?"

She squeaked a little as Cora slipped her fingers beneath the thin fabric of her shift, her back instinctively bowing up towards the touch, offering her body in supplication to her lady. "How could I keep you, Cora? You have everything waiting for you back home?" she murmured as she helped Cora slip her arms out of her sleeves, only hazily aware of what she was doing.

"Everything but freedom and companionship. Baxter is nice enough, but she's too meek, compared to you. Never looks up when Robert joins me in my rooms. Never looks at me, barely concealed amusement on her lips, as she jerks her head towards my husband. Never touches me the way you do when she dresses me."

Sarah took a deep breath as Cora's hands slipped her shift off her shoulders, revealing the corset to her gaze. "I was with you for years before I dared to let my true self into the room with you. Maybe this Baxter just needs a little more time?"

"Time is a luxury I don't have." Sarah looked away from her as Cora fumbled with the buttons on her own dress. "Would you be a dear?"

She knew that she could never say to Cora, especially when she gave her that sweet pout, and Sarah nodded as she reached out and made quick work of the rest of the buttons, slipping the dress off along with her shift before loosening the laces on her corset. Languidly, Cora sat up and allowed her clothes to pool around her waist as she tugged off her corset and dropped it to the floor. "You are so bleedin' beautiful," Sarah whispered, pressing her hands to her chest once more as she stared at those breasts that had long teased her dreams.

"Only because you see me as such. Robert doesn't even bother to removed my nightgown when he does his duty. But the way you're looking at me? Like I'm a piece of candy that you want to devour? Makes me realise that I am still desirable."

Sarah nodded as Cora shimmied out of the rest of her clothes before stretching out on the bed next to Sarah. Because of her height, Cora was perfectly placed so that all Sarah had to do was lean in and she would be kissing her still firm chest. It seemed that Cora knew the same damn thing, since she reached out and buried her hand in Sarah's hair, dislodging some from the neat braid it was kept in, and pulled her close. As she licked her lips a bit, finding even breathing decidedly uncomfortable, she felt Cora's stiff nipple, and a groan tumbled from her mouth as she closed her eyes and began to suckle the warm, turgid, peak. It was heaven, and once Sarah had started, she wondered if she would ever be able to stop worshipping Cora's body.

She barely acknowledged the feel of Cora's fingers undoing her braid, but she couldn't ignore the rough tug on her hair that had her looking up into the other woman's eyes, seeing how lust had clouded the blue eyes into an almost stormy grey. "Isn't there more to this than that?" she teased, and Sarah shrugged a little. Cora shook her head a little, and it was then that Sarah saw that her own lustrous hair was loose, and she reached up to twist a few locks around her fingers, luxuriating in the silky feel of it.

Cora rolled her eyes a little as she reached out and pushed Sarah onto her back. "Milady?"

"I like it better when you call me Cora. I'm not your lady any longer, now am I?" Sarah slowly shook her head as she felt Cora shove her dress and shift down her body before attacking the laces of her corset, horribly tangling them in her haste. "Blast," she muttered as she glanced up at Sarah. "I guess you have a choice. Get the knot out, or let me cut them."

It was Sarah's turn to roll her eyes and she shook her head as she sat up a little, her nimble fingers quickly undoing the mess Cora had made of the laces before leaning up and kissing Cora softly, groaning a little as the woman pushed her back down onto the mattress, thoroughly unlacing her corset and tossing the laces to the floor, eliciting a much different sort of groan from her lips. "It will take me ten minutes to redo that, Cora."

"Well, I guess you'll just have to have nimble fingers, Sarah. Would you care to practice on me?" The sultry look on her face was positively sinful, and all Sarah could do in reply was nod before Cora's lips were capturing hers in a torrid kiss. The last coherent thought Sarah held in her mind was just how much she had been waiting for this moment as the years had rolled by, and she hoped that she would be afforded the luxury of partaking in this sweet pleasure many times over the course of Cora's visit with them.


End file.
